Divorce is not like a volcano. One fine day, we find that a volcano has erupted. Divorce happens over a period of time. The relationship breaks down continuously and we realize that life can no longer be lived together. Many couples wake up when the break down has become total. That becomes very difficult to save the marriage. After that they spend endless nights worrying about what to do - To go for divorce or not? Why not to take care of the relationship today and find out how it is and what care it needs. What changes will make it better? And improve it before it reaches the brink?


Ask questions such as - Am I happy in my marriage/ Is my partner happy? Am I emotionally satisfied? What about my partner? Is marriage giving us joy or pain? Are we still in love? Is one of us feeling victimized? Shall we grow together till our old age? Are we loyal to each other? What kind of relationship do we share now? Are we feeling sick of each other? And so on. Raise as many questions about your marriage, yourself and your partner as you can think of. Take some online tests and quizzes on marriage and relationship. That will give lot of thought to your mind.


As you think of questions, you will start thinking more deeply about where you are heading. Find out all that is going wrong. Try to improve that. Discuss with your partner about what you think. Find out all that is going right. Make it still better. Think, plan and act. Before thinking, test your marriage in all the possible ways. Wake up now. Tomorrow may be too late.

Current info about Annulment is not always the easiest thing to locate. Fortunately, this report includes the latest Annulment info available.

Annulment is a legal procedure for declaring a marriage null and void. Annulment differs from divorce where the court ends an otherwise legal marriage on a specific date.

In strict legal terminology, annulment refers only to making a voidable marriage null; if the marriage is void ab initio, then it is automatically null, although a legal declaration of nullity is required to establish this. The process of obtaining such a declaration is similar to the annulment process.

Grounds for Annulment
Grounds for a marriage being voidable or void ab initio vary in different legal jurisdictions, but are typically limited to fraud, bigamy, and mental incompetence including that:

* Either spouse was already married to someone else at the time of the marriage;

* Either spouse was too young to be married, or too young without required court or parental consent;

* Either spouse was under the influence of drugs or alcohol at the time of the marriage;

* Either spouse was mentally incompetent at the time of the marriage;

* If the consent to the marriage was based on fraud or force;

* Either spouse was physically incapable to be married (typically, inability to have sexual intercourse which persists) at the time of the marriage;

* The marriage is prohibited by law due to the relationship between the parties.

* Infidelity exists in marriage, or partners are unfaithful

You can't predict when knowing something extra about Annulments will come in handy. If you learned anything new in this article, you should print and file it where you can find it again.

GENERAL RULE AS TO VALIDITY OF A WILL EXECUTED IN A FOREIGN PLACE

1. A Will is to be taken to be properly executed if its execution conforms to the Internal Law in force in the place:-

* a) where it was executed; or
* b) which was the testator's domicile or habitual residence, either at the time the Will was executed, or at the testator's death; or
* c) of which the testator was a national, either at the date of execution of the Will, or at the testator's death.

2. The following Wills are also to be taken to be properly executed:-

* a) a Will executed on board a vessel or aircraft, if the Will has been executed in conformity with the internal law in force in the place with which the vessel or aircraft may be taken to have been most closely connected having regard to its registration and other relevant circumstances; or
* b) a Will, so far as it disposes of immovable property, if it has been executed in conformity with the internal law in force in the place where the property is situated; or
* c) a Will, so far as it revokes a Will or a provision of a Will which has been executed, to have been properly executed in conformity with any law by which the earlier Will or provision would be taken to have been validly executed; or
* d) a Will, so far as it exercises a power of appointment, if the Will has been executed in conformity with the law governing the validity of the power.

3. A Will to which this applies, so far as it exercises a power of appointment, is not to be taken to have been improperly executed because it has not been executed in accordance with the formalities required by the instrument creating the power.

Notwithstanding the above, we stress that it is more appropriate to execute a Will that complies fully with all local requirements. This is in preference to having to establish both the bona fides of the Will and the country of origin in which the Will was originally executed.

Child Custody Laws differ from state to state. You need to check with your state's laws to get the most current information. When it comes to child custody Laws, there are a few states that have all the procedures laid out for the separating parents and there children. The judges must follow these guidelines to assist in determining the custody of the children during and after a divorce.

There aren't many federal laws that apply to children's custody, with the exception of transporting across different state lines. States do have differing laws that deal with jurisdiction between other states, but not all states have this understanding however. So if one parent lives in one state and the parent and children in another, the state where the children reside will have more influence. Of course you must take into consideration which state the separation and custody papers where filed.

Child custody Laws are designed with interest of the children as the first priority. Child custody laws are designed to prevent custody going to abusers of drugs or alcohol. Laws are also in place that prevents the children from going to an environment where there is clear mental or physical abuse. Most states prefer joint custody between the parents, where both parents can be a functional part of raising the children. The parents would share both physical and legal custody of the children.

It's really important to understand these two distinctions in the Child custody laws. Physical custody is where the children are residing. When a child lives a large portion of time with one parent, that parent has what is known as physical custody. Often times during the summer months children leave one parent to live in the house of the other. During those situations physical custody moves from one parent to the other.

Legal custody is the right and responsibility to make important decisions regarding health, education, and well being issues. Often both physical custody and legal custody are with the same parent, unless the parents have joint custody. During those situations the court may decided that where the children reside at the time that that parent can determine what is best for the children at the time. However is would be wise to have a consensus between the parents.

Again, research the child custody laws of your state or province to determine what the best solution is for you during these trying times. Always have the children's best interest when making these decisions.

Should I Reconcile? You are older and wiser now, with an experience or two, and a decision to make.

Your desire to reconcile is often a desire to live the dream. To revive your passions and the hopes you lived in the beginning. To return to 'Go' and start over with a new role of the dice.

Purhaps reconciliation is not your own desire, but forced upon you like a load of dirty laundry. Forced upon you by silent and sullen children. Forced upon you by a repentant spouse, full of promises and needs greater than your own. Forced upon you by family, religion, and tradition of the day.

Should I reconcile? Should I accept the hurt, the pain, and call it a day? Can I face the unknown, or is there more comfort in this familiar but battered arena? Yes, you are older and wiser now, with a decision to make.

How to Decide

Take a blank piece of paper, any paper, and if you are inclined you can create a spreadsheet or flow chart, it matters not the medium. Across the top draw a single line, and down the centre draw another line. At the top on one side write the word STAY. The other side gets MOVE ON.

There is no secret or trick to this; simply write down every reason or excuse for saving or ending your marriage. This writer remembers being asked to make a list of all the possible uses for the lowly paper clip. Writing down one use leads to another and another, the list reached 50 ideas within two minuets. At another table their list numbered 110. The point my friend is to just jot down, pro and con. Your list might take a life of its own, growing hour by hour, day by day.

At least three things will happen.
- You will come to a decision.
- You will have clearer understanding of the issues.
- You have the beginings of a course of action

Staying means taking action and making one more commitment to your marriage. That commitment is not yours alone. You both have issues to resolve. It is not prudent to take the easy road by ducking the issues. Face them head on. Pay the price in the currency of hard work and honest communication, without it couples often fall back into old habits. A recommendable course of action is joint marriage counselling, and in many cases joint financial counselling.

Moving on means acceptance, and closes the option of going back into the marriage. While it may be sad, it also frees you to look to your future without the complications of all the "what if's". Moving on can be like passing Go and collecting your $200, knowing the next trip around the block might be better than the last.

I did everything possible to save our relationship. I gave in a lot, but I could not save. We will be breaking-up soon. That has already broken my heart. This relationship was made brick by brick over so many years. What all we did not do to make it last? But alas, we are breaking -up. This is a typical statement from a person facing break-up. How to survive after a break-up? Will you survive a break-up? Why not quiz yourself about it?

The immediate effect of the break-up would be pain. Will you be able to take the pain? The pain would go away slowly over a number of years, but the initial impact will be high. You will have to gather all your energy and tolerate the pain.

The second effect would be bitterness and blame. You will non stop think about the behavior of your ex partner and fix blame everywhere. You will recap all the arguments and fights and there will be a large amount of self-talk about how you were ditched. That will not be a pleasant experience. You will have to find way out of all this by spending quality time with friends, involving you in new activities, and keep yourself busy. Are you ready for that?

The major effect would be the temptation to join immediately with anew partner. This can work both the ways. Some people never wish to form a relationship again after undergoing the trauma, while some want to form a relationship as soon as possible to forget the earlier one. Both of theses choices carry danger. The best alternative is to wait for sometime and when you find your stability and self esteem back, try and form another relationship. Are you ready for this?

The Passion Ration

The last straw to finalize divorce proceedings in a marriage is when adultery is committed. I would say the hurt is unbearable for the loving partner who has been betrayed. Innocent Parties like the children and family members automatically become involved to take their share of the heartache when a marriage collapses.

Many couples manage to salvage what is left of their relationship and carry on regardless fighting a lost cause. It is not easy to put your feelings and emotions on hold. Emotions are a powerful force that comes back with vengeance filling you with anger and in some cases hate.

All the respect and trust has gone leaving that once happy relationship a farce. They say you forgive and forget. Sorry having none of it, forgive yes forget no, mental scarring does not heal.

So much suffering is caused by a one night stand or affairs that normally do not last long after the guilty party has lost everything. Ask your self is it worth it.

I do not condone such behaviour where a man or woman strays outside the Marital Home to seek pleasure; only in some cases there are reasons why partners go down this road seeking comfort elsewhere.

May be the adulterer is not the guilty one. What of the spouse who decides to ration the passion in the bedroom leaving the partner no choice but to have his or her needs fulfilled outside the marriage.

You need to think twice before making a one sided decision about when you want to play or not play ball in the bedroom. Excuse the pun, but the ball is in your court to put back the missing link that is causing your marriage and partner to suffer.

They say true love never runs smooth, and if that being the case then for a little happiness give me the rough with the smooth any day.

If you have a problem regarding being bored in the bedroom, talk it over with your partner.

Rekindling a relationship is a made a lot easier if both parties participate in trying to understand why such actions were taken in the first place. Talking it through may help you both realize that the marriage is worth saving.

Counselling is out there for couples struggling to come to terms with the fact the marriage is over. Consider the children's feelings throughout any divorce proceedings, they will need time to adapt to having there whole life turned around.

Abide by your marriage vows, if out of spite you decide to sleep alone in the master bedroom then accept the fact that the guilty part is the Betrayer not the Strayer.

Divorce is certainly an emotional time for families. In fact, it ranks as one of the most stressful experiences in life. However, it is not only the adults who experience this stress. If the adults are parents, their children often suffer greatly. Their suffering can not be entirely eliminated. A certain amount of grief at the 'death' of their parents' relationship is to be expected. Nevertheless, while the adults are going through typically arduous legal wrangling it is important for them to remember the needs of their children and put them first. Deciding to cooperate for their sake will help to protect the children's emotional well being by maintaining their sense of security and need for unconditional love. Marital breakdown is difficult for everyone - especially children. There are several ways in which loving, responsible parents can cooperate for the good of their children. Even though the marriage may have broken down, the parental relationship is 'till death do us part'.

Child and youth counselors emphasize that children need lasting relationships with both parents. More often than not joint custody is granted because of this accepted understanding. Ideally, the relationship of the parents should be business-like and cooperative for the sake of the children. Children should not witness hostility between their parents and should not hear negative statements about either parent. It is recommended that parents commit to regularly scheduled meetings, in a neutral location for the purpose of discussing child-related issues. Education, medical, religious and moral issues that concern the children's well- being need to be dealt with by both parents. If emotions prohibit calm conversation, there are often family justice counselors available in the community to facilitate these important meetings.

Children going through the divorce of their parents usually have many questions and worries. Compassionate responses are required and it certainly takes mature parents in order to put aside their own issues and help their children gain some understanding about a situation over which they have no control. Unfortunately, many children experience guilt and often blame themselves for the marital breakup of their parents. Counseling - whether group or individual - can be an effective way to lessen this destructive burden. The objectivity of the counselor may help the child open up and share his/her feelings. As children mature, their questions will differ so the issue of their parents' divorce is never really over. A commitment on behalf of both parents to open communication with the children will reassure them greatly.

Divorce is not just a termination. It’s a beginning.

Maybe your friends of the family or people at work will be going through its own set of changes as you face others with your new civil status.
Divorce may be defined as a termination but it is the start of new beginnings and the introduction of a number of changes in both you and your children’s lives.

Is divorce for you?

Before that, if you are reading this and are in the process of considering divorce, take a moment to think about several assertions. If you believe that you can accept the following assertions as true in your marital relationship, give the idea of divorcing your mate a second thought.

• I believe I still have love for my mate.
• I am prepared to seek counseling or marital therapy for the sake of the relationship.
• I want to transform for the better.
• I value openness and truthfulness in my relationship with my mate.
• It doesn’t matter who’s right or wrong, what matters is that I am willing to seek forgiveness or forgive when needed.

However, if you cannot see yourself in the mentioned assertions, read on to gain a basic understanding of divorce.

There have been misunderstandings as to how divorce and annulment differ. As mentioned, divorce is a termination of the marriage contract. Annulment, on the other hand, deems the marriage null and void, as if one were never married in the first place.

In certain areas where divorce has stigma attached to it due to the country’s dominant religious belief, annulment is more popular.

The Popularity of divorce

Most developed countries, despite certain religious stigma, divorce is widely acceptable. The popularity of divorce in developed countries has been on the up rise since the 20th century. Countries like the United States, United Kingdom, Canada, and South Korea, have all been affected by this popularity of divorce.
However, in the Philippines and Malta, divorce is illegal. Even if divorce is legal in Japan, the country has been able to maintain a distinctly low divorce ratio. Because of the Catholic Church’s influence, a number of countries in Europe have banned divorce. As a result, people in these locations seek out other areas in order to get divorced.

The very first thing you must realize is that you will not die because of divorce. It has happened to millions of people before you and it will happen to millions of people after you.

Although divorce cause severe emotional pain, you must believe that you will get over it. Of course, it takes time, but you will eventually recover and find love again. It is very important that you understand this.

It is crucial to understand that the marriage is over. It is vital that you immediately let go of the other person and begin setting your own life in order.

You must not think about pain or dwell upon what was yesterday. The more you think about the past the worse it will hurt, and the longer it will take for you to recover.

You must think about yourself. You cannot allow yourself to just sit and waste away. You need to take hold of yourself and go on living.

In order to counter bad feelings, you must keep yourself busy - clean your house, wash your car, write out a budget, study or go to work. Keep yourself moving and working on the kinds of things that make you happy.

It is extremely important that you express the feelings of anger you are carrying or they will eat you alive. The best way to deal with anger is to know exactly what you are angry about and then choose the most suitable way to express your anger to the person that has made you angry.

Another important thing in recovering from a divorce is to eliminate the feelings of guilt from your mind as quickly as they come into sight. Simply tell yourself that your marriage did not work out. You must forget about your ex as quickly as you possibly can!

Of course all of this is much easier said than done, but these things you must do, and you must do them right away.

To recover from the trauma of divorce, you must allow enough time for the healing process to be completed and be positive that tomorrow will be a happier day for you.

The high divorce rate of recent in Britain is a major factor leading to ever increasing levels of debt, a new report claimed recently.

Debt Free Direct has claimed that the break down of marriages is a significant factor behind people's financial problems, which suggests that many are forced to take out a debt consolidation loan following the completion of a divorce procedure.

The debt advisory agency has reported that those who are divorced are a third more likely to be declared bankrupt. Of those divorcees, women are running the highest risk.

Females are 14 per cent more likely to face financial ruin and are 26 per cent less likely to qualify for an individual voluntary arrangement, which can prevent bankruptcy.

Heavy debts that are incurred by an ex partner are a major cause of financial problems, even after a divorce, with Debt Free Direct finding that an ex's excessive debts are an underlying factor in almost three in ten bankruptcies in the UK.

Typically, people in a relationship will take on debts in joint names with their partner, never believing that the relationship will end. But when it does the effect of divorce or separation can seriously heighten the impact of the debt problem, spokesman Derek Oakley explained.

Mr Oakley advised married or divorcing couples to take steps to protect themselves from the poor finances of their partner.

For example, he said, even after divorce, many couples still hold credit cards and / or store cards in joint names.

After separation it is important to advise the credit card company to terminate the joint card. If you do not do this, you could well be pursued for payments on debts that your ex partner has run up.

The report contradicts previous assumptions that debt levels are exacerbated by a growing consumerist culture and relaxed attitude towards credit.

Getting prepared for the Child Custody Evaluation can be nerve racking, but if you take these things into consideration they can guide to you toward a successful Child Custody hearing.

You should be friendly, sincere and candid in your approach toward the opposing attorney. You should the look at the psychological evaluation as if it is a job interview. You should never confide with psychologist. If you do, it may be used against you later. Answer the questions in short, brief, direct sentences. Never give more information than you have to.

You should not say anything against the other parent and his or her family. Show that you know your children and you know about their interests, hobbies, teachers, friends, their educational aims, etc. You should let the psychologist know about all the good qualities of your children. If the psychologist wants to know anything negative about the other parent, you should simply narrate an incident with the facts and stop at that, the psychologist needs to draw the conclusion.

You shouldn’t make any accusation regarding any type of abuse like physical, mental or sexual, until there is enough proof for the same. The psychologist can report to CYS for further investigation for child abuse, if you suspect child abuse, then you should report to CYS instead of making allegations, since false allegations can prove damaging to your reputation and this case as well.

You will require to prepare for the interactional sessions, for this you can bring games, food, homework, anything that might seem appropriate, you should not stray away from the target, you should also make a list of doctors, temples or churches, etc. schools, you should also be aware of any special need of your child and inform the doctor about how you are going to go about fulfilling this need.

So that you remain mentally strong, cool and collected you should get a good night’s sleep. You should pay the psychologist’s fees promptly and try to impress him since his report carries a lot of weight with the judge. In case the psychologist wanted additional information, you can send him information along with a short note about it. You should not call the psychologist unless he wishes so.

You should showcase the current needs of your children instead of focusing on the other parent’s failures. Since the contested Child Custody case is never a finality, you can modify the case and resulting Child Custody schedule at any time later.